Disclaimer: This is my attempt at writing an emotional post.
*insert raised eyebrows, questioning looks and loud scoffs*
I’ve tried over the several few weeks (or maybe months) at penning down the various things I’ve noticed, felt or just pondered, but most of the time, I turn up nothing.
I’ve been poked, prodded, provoked and fuelled by what I’ve read from blogs of close friends delving into finding, (re)discovering or just constantly seeking out oneself and I wonder where I deviated; where I lost that sense of self.
I remember back when I was still blogging for myself, I used to ask myself occasionally whether I was losing “me” at any point in time. But now that I have truly been obscured by the veils of the white noise, I seem to not question myself anymore. How ironic; how moral-less; how soul-less.
Different blogs serve different purposes to their respective authors. Some serve as show-blogs where riches and wealth are flaunted as a hallmark of the author’s supposed extravagant lifestyle; others a reflective, personal journal where daily events are recorded with meticulous care. I used to be the latter, but some how “graduated” to joining the lower rungs of the “upper echelons” – the former category. It’s not a bad thing really. I quite like a bit of variety in my writing. I get to write differently for the various genres required.
But with gains in popularity comes loss in privacy. You’d say it comes with the territory, but I dont think I could deal with living my entire life out in the cyber world.
Or maybe it’s just me. I’ve hit the point where emotions no longer take precedence. And it’s not imperative for me to jot them all down.
Or maybe, life is on autopilot now and is coasting through with no turbulence. In other words, I have nothing exciting to write about. DOES IT MEAN I AM BECOMING BORING?!!!???!?!
Or maybe I am becoming RATIONAL and everything is now as simple as A-B-C.
As you can clearly see, I have failed miserably in emotional writing. Maybe I should take a class in reflective writing.